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Member Since: Sat May 17, 2008
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Member Since: Fri Apr 28, 2017
Posts: 1,201
Subj: Re: I agree 100% and it can really be difficult for someone not there to really know...
Posted: Wed Nov 22, 2017 at 02:58:44 pm EST (Viewed 85 times)
Reply Subj: I agree 100% and it can really be difficult for someone not there to really know...
Posted: Wed Nov 22, 2017 at 12:15:13 pm EST (Viewed 85 times)


      Between true sexual abuse and harassment, and just women getting offended or feeling uncomfortable. There is true sexual harassment out there (And men can get harassed as well.), but sometimes it can be very vague. Pretty much anyone can be brought up or accused. I remember there was a time at my old job where the bus driver came in and said something like "Women can't cook , or cook as well as men.". A guy was cooking at that time, I think that he might have been joking, but then a female worker heard it, got offended, and accused him of sexual harassment. So sometimes (Or maybe even more than sometimes.) that happens, and sometimes it's just a case of women being offended or made uncomfortable by simple guy talk or male behavior. Heck, sometimes even harmless flirting can fall into this. So, I think that this can be a good thing if it gets us to really narrow this down, and at the same time, weed out the true harassers.

    ...what has really happened.

It can be difficult, but that does not mean it is not a problem or did not happen either.

I mean it is pretty clear that a fair number of guys will deny pretty nasty things for as long as they can. I am sure some women do too but there is a pretty long list of people denying things until the end.

Even when there is some level of evidence there is. I think caution is called for but when a pattern emerges I think the threshold drops. Most people that do this sort of thing do not just do it once.

    I personally know of many cases where a relative, ex-girlfriend, a friend, etc...has expressed how they were sexually harassed. It then turned out to be something as little as a man they found unattractive asking them out, for a phone number or saying they thought they were very pretty. They would say..."It made me feel uncomfortable." And I was flabbergasted at how overly sensitive and over the top their reactions were.

I have not heard anything to that degree. Feeling uncomfortable about being asked out is not harassment. However, many women are being sent penis pictures they did not ask for. That is, being hit on all of the time after saying no can be. There are many others.

I know a fair number of women as well, and none have been that ticky tacky but they have been harassed to varying degrees. I would imagine they are more of the norm.

    That said...there IS a lot of harassment out there and it is totally unacceptable behavior for men (or women) to treat the opposite sex so inappropriately.

    Where evidence is clear its easy...where its not so clear or its a he said/she said case it becomes very difficult and I am not sure how to solve this.

One most keep in mind this does not have to meet the legal level of evidence. As some things can very much be harassment but not violate the law per se.

It depends on the situation, both parties involved, witnesses and so on and so forth. If it comes out, for instance, that a guy has a history of saying inappropriate things to women than it seems like things are stacked against the guy in that case.

It is rare that these guys are one offs. It is one of the reasons that once one person comes forward against somebody multiple people tend to do so as well.

    Any woman assaulted should feel safe coming forward and pinning her molester to the wall legally...however false accusations should also face severe repercussions as you cold ruin a persons life over something like this even if they are proven innocent.

I think this gets complicated. If you are saying, you have to have strong evidence to push a case legally or you will be punished is a good way of stopping women from coming forward in the first place.

Even if there is nothing legal to be done about the situation, if it is at work and a woman faces it than they need to report it. I understand what you are getting at, but it is a tough standard to meet.

What if somebody was assaulted, did not have an air tight case and the guy got better lawyers. Not only was the woman assaulted or whatever but now she is fined and facing a short jail term? That is not how the system works.

I am sure that there are false accusations, but most estimates do not have the false accusations as high as some folks like to make it be. There are man ymore men and women that are victums that are afraid to come forward.

At the moment, there is still a strong cultural movement in some circles, to call women liars outright. As a culture it has to be ok to tell somebody. Who that person is will vary quite a bit. But the only way that any point can be addressed to any degree is to know there is a problem.

Sometimes, in a minor case, somebody being told something is not ok is enough, but in many cases that is not the case either.

Look Raist bunnies...
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