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Member Since: Sat May 17, 2008
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Subj: Re: Here is my review
Posted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 at 09:31:57 pm EST (Viewed 1096 times)
Reply Subj: Justice League Review (by the Joker) (feat. Jared Leto)
Posted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 at 03:59:52 am EST (Viewed 1121 times)

    I saw JL this Tuesday at a special screening. It was: tiresome, boring and absolutely exhausting. It was unbearable... I couldn't believe that they made a mockery out of these iconic characters (totally misunderstanding certain things that made them work in comics, stupid quips, generic CGI big bad with long speeches, I mean, sure, BvS was bad, but this was just plain dull, you just wanted to get it over with).

    And this is Batman at his absolute worst (unfocused, slow, inept, not invested in anything + if BvS had two memorable fight scenes with him, one in the desert & another at that warehouse, this one had none of it, he's as useless as he was during the Doomsday battle): even Clooney shines as bright as the sun compared to this guy.

    I left the theater somewhat exhausted, broken & confused. It felt so disjointed, joyless that it was very hard to believe that this is supposed to be Batman and other iconic characters assembling together to overcome the impossible odds... so cliche, so predictable, so uneven, and Steppenwolf... the less said about him, the better.

Agreed. I didn't find Justice League to be awful, but it wasn't good. It has a few exciting moments, but on the whole it's a dull, clumsy movie; better than BvS but worse than Wonder Woman. Not coincidentally, Wonder Woman shines in the film, Flash is funny, but the other characters just lumber about. Batman is the worst. Ben Affleck wears this fake looking stocky muscle suit that makes him look like a body builder on steroids. Affleck never seems comfortable in the role and delivers his lines meekly. Batman's complete 180 on Superman in this movie makes him seem like he was insane in BvS, which I guess isn't inaccurate given his portrayal there.

Aquaman is one-dimensional rugged dude. Basically he has the personality of Wolverine. Cyborg is just bland. None of the characters are given the proper time to be built up. The Avengers is 24 minutes longer than Justice League and notice that The Avengers didn't try to give Black Widow and Hawkeye, the two Avengers who didn't have their own movies first, much back story and certainly didn't try to squeeze their own supporting cast into the movie. Justice League does the opposite for Flash, Aquaman, and Cyborg, and it's too much. They are each given their own little internal conflicts - Flash is anxious about his father being in jail, Cyborg is anxious about his father making him half machine, and Aquaman has to reconcile his loner status. This is done in brief moments that carry no emotional weight. Mera, Silas Stone, Henry Allen but also Hippolyta and Commissioner Gordon are all hung out to dry and fail to generate any sparks. Lois Lane and Martha Kent do get an attempt at character development but the scene comes across as inept and ungainly.

It doesn't help the characters that so much of the dialogue is atrocious and groan-worthy. Batman says, "This isn’t the plan," and Alfred responds, "No, Master Wayne, this is the team." Cyborg says, "I heard about you. Didn't think you were real," and Batman responds, "I'm real when it's useful." Wonder Woman states, "People said the age of heroes would never come again," and Batman gets the even worse line, "It has to. We don't have any more time!" The only good Batman line is when he replies to Barry Allen's "What are your superpowers again?" with "I'm rich." The worst dialogue is the embarrassing, super sentimental Lois Lane voiceover that's like drenching the movie's ending with diarrhea. "There are heroes among us. Not to make us feel smaller, but to remind us of what makes us great." Make me barf already.

Pacing and editing are a mess so dramatic beats are missed - scenes don't have exciting build ups. Missing what was one of the best moments in The Avengers, there's never a shot of the Justice League finally all together in one frame during the final battle (assuming that's the point of the end credits sporting a Beatles' cover of "Come Together"). Also screwing up the drama is that so much of the film is dull flat exposition with the characters explaining all kinds of ridiculous sounding stuff at length - the mother boxes, Flash's nonsensical costume, how Cyborg works, Aquaman's Atlantis background. The opening is head-scratching with Batman attacking a man with pigeons with no explanation, which is followed up by his fighting a parademon who decides to commit suicide while leaving behind clues to what it's after. That's really convenient. The Wonder Woman opener though is fabulous, especially her saving hostages from machine gun fire. When Gadot was initially cast in the part, I thought she was too skinny for the role, but she bulked up and proved me wrong. She has great screen presence, and Wonder Woman comes off spectacularly.

Henry Cavill is a marvelous physical presence as Superman. I've seen many people complain about him in the role, but I think he's fine as an actor. The DCEU movies just don't know how to depict the character right, which isn't his fault. This movie is the best Superman yet in the DCEU. For once, his characterization is not a problem in the movie except for his temporary insanity when he's first brought back. That's just an excuse for a fight scene. Superman though makes all the other characters except Wonder Woman look redundant. Once we see that Steppenwolf is not remotely a match for Superman, there's not much suspense, and there wasn't much suspense to begin with because the movie's plot is so predictable.

Steppenwolf is a really poor choice for the main villain. He comes off as utterly generic. He's even a second rate villain in the comics. In one of Jack Kirby's rare mistakes, he gave him a stupid name that is more associated with the band of "Born to Be Wild," which preceded the character. Steppenwolf is all plot device.

Nitpicks: While Flash is funny, he’s got too much of the MCU Peter Parker newbie thing going on which makes it feel derivative. Bruce Wayne is entirely too cavalier about leaking his Batman identity. He and Aquaman talk openly about Bruce being Batman in front of other people. He reveals it to all the Justice Leaguers right away except for Cyborg who uncovers it himself. One of Bruce Wayne's jokes about buying the bank that foreclosed the Kent home was already done better in the Nolan Batman movies when he bought a hotel, but it also makes Bruce look stupid. Just freakin' buy back the farm instead of wasting your money. At the end, Superman and Flash engage in a race, but it doesn't have much resonance since these two characters have barely interacted in the whole movie. It's only really meaningful to comic book readers familiar with the nod to those stories.

Grade: C-

How to make an entrance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=49xWJJvpjzI
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